A few minutes ago, I was listening to M83’s “Midnight City” and some Savoir Adore tracks, specifically “Dreamers” and the Yes Giantess remix of “We Talk Like Machines.”
I realized that electro beats are robot heartbeats and thought about the giant light cube at Creator’s Project a couple weekends ago.
I’ll admit it, I found out about Mal Blum’s “New Year’s Eve” in a totally uncool way – it was in a commercial. No finding out about her song on a super indie music blog. No stumbling upon a tiny show of hers at a dive-y venue. No. No. No. No.
I found out about her because I was totally Google-creeping Freja Beha. I’ll be honest, I was Facebook chatting a friend and the topic of how hot Freja Beha is came up and also the fact that she’s one of my dream girls and also the fact that she’s a model and the fact that she’s a lesbian. Basically, she’s the girl I wish I could sleep with and also the girl I wish I could be. If only I were 7 inches taller…
Anyway, I happened to come across Nylon’s “Fashion Movie: Freja Beha x Free People” post about the (at the time) latest Free People ad spot featuring Freja Beha in various lookbook-esque poses and outfits.
It’s pretty obvious why they used Mal Blum’s song:
“I don’t like my t-shirt. I don’t like my blue jeans.” I mean, come on, of course you’d want to buy some awesome Free People pieces if you’re reminded that you don’t like t-shirt or your jeans. And how perfectly timed to include a song that mentions “it’s a happy New Year unlike all the rest. Feels like I am changing, and I know it’s for the best.” What is more epitomic of change, especially New Year’s change than a total wardrobe change? And what else is perfect? “Last year is ending just in time…” Yes, last year is ending just in time, considering the ad was featured on January 31. Essentially, what music could be more perfect for a Free People ad?
Ok, Media Studies major tangent over… kind of. And no, I didn’t mean for that to all sound sarcastic. I really do believe that that song was just absolutely perfect for a January clothing ad.
The New Year for me, the beginning of 2012, felt as if it were taking a massive dump on me.
I was broke – in so many definitions and levels of the term:
My bank statement looked pretty depressing.
I had a disgusting cold and a decommissioned right shoulder.
And for almost two weeks, I was so pathetically heartbroken that all I could do was just go home after work to a bottle of cheap wine and cry.
Most of all were five moments that seriously stick out for me:
A few days before New Year’s, during one of those morning after hours, a girl asked me jokingly “Do you ever sleep alone?” reminding me of the promiscuous reputation I’ve gained among friends of mine.
A few days later a different girl told me that she really wanted to sleep with me but didn’t want to just end up another girl on my list.
That reminded me of a few months before when a girl told me, “I don’t want to just be another girl you sleep with. I want to feel like I’m special to you.”
On December 31 around 8pm, I found out that the girl I’d fallen for at the beginning of 2011, the girl who told me that she was so physically attracted to me but who “respected” me so much that she didn’t want to be the person she used to be who would “use [me] physically”, the girl who told me that she was at a position where she felt she really just needed a friend, just got a girlfriend. An amazing, gorgeous, beautiful woman of a girlfriend. I’d never felt like more of a kid than at that moment. No matter how much I talked about my work in consulting. No matter how much I bragged about graduating a year early from a top-ranked university. No matter which big-name client I hyped up – I still felt like some stupid kid compared to this amazing, world-changing bombshell of a girlfriend of hers.
And that’s when at 10:45pm on December 31, 2011, I realized that I’d never be anyone’s girlfriend – that I’m just the skinny, “attractive” kid that people want to sleep with. And yeah, 99% of the time, I love that. I just want to sleep with gorgeous women and be friends and hang out. But when it hit me that the only time I wanted anything more than that with someone as enthralling as that girl yet couldn’t have it, I nearly broke down.
And with that, I present Mal Blum’s “New Year’s Eve,” which I discovered via a Nylon Magazine post about a Free People Freja Beha ad at just the exact time I was getting over all the emotions described in the song:
I found out about Charli XCX completely by accident because of a mistake made by the Knocks/Popshop Radio.
I was listening to the Popshop Radio 12 mix by The Knocks and thought “Man, this really sounds like Feist if she went all electro” at the end. I went over to the Popshop site to see the track listing on the mix and at the very end, I saw “Nuclear Seasons” by Charli XCX.
Googled Charli XCX and found out her site offers that exact song as a free download. “SCORE!” I exclaimed in my head (because I already exclaim too many things out loud in front of other people – not that it mattered at that moment because I was alone at the time). Anyway, I plug in my info and download the song. Click the play triangle on iTunes and am surprised to realize it sounds nothing at all like the Feist-sound-a-like I heard earlier. In fact, Charli XCX sounds like Marina and the Diamonds but with more 80s-inspired, Madonna twinkly synths and boom-boom-ahhhhhs. I can’t remember exactly which 80s band/singer’s darker notes this reminds me of, but I’ll post that in when I do remember.
Maybe I was going about it the wrong way? the darker synths weren’t a female 80s pop star’s style but more Depeche Mode’s “Enjoy the Silence”? DEFINITELY! It feels/sounds right.
ANYWAY…
Is this a NEW new wave? Neo-new wave? neu new wave? Awwwww… Just looked it up: I can’t patent “neu wave” or “Neu new wave” because 1) there’s a company called Neu Wave. I think it’s for acne medication, 2) there’s a band called “Neu!” (The exclamation is actually in their name. I don’t know if I’m excited about them just yet. I’ll have to listen to them first.), and 3) I’m pretty sure I’ve heard people talk about “new new wave” before or so. Damn
Newtro? as in New+retro? Neutro? Neutron. hahahaha
Morning Music Epiphany: “Little Bit” by Lykke Li and Florence + the Machine’s cover of Drake and Rihanna’s “Take Care” makes a really good conversation between songs/singers. Heard back to back, it’s like they’re in love with each other.
A big part is that Lykke Li sounds as if she’s so uncertain about being in love with someone — it’s as if she’s scared to make herself vulnerable for love. However, she does admit, “And for you I keep my legs apart and forget about my tainted heart, and I will never ever be the first to say it, but still I, you know, I I I.” The end of that line really gets me because it’s as if she’s hesitant to declare her love, her vulnerability.
After “Little Bit” stops playing, Lykke Li’s vulnerability and fear of allowing oneself to be in love is answered and reassured by Florence and the Machine. In particular, it’s as if she is actually telling Lykke Li “I know you’ve been hurt, by, someone else. I can tell by the way, you carry yourself. If you let me, here’s what I’ll do. I’ll take care of you. I’ve loved and I’ve lost.”
And then the kicker? When Florence sings “Dealing with a heart that I didn’t break.”
Two things… Actually three now that I’m on a slightly tangential mode of thinking:
1. If you know me personally, you’ll probably notice my way of thinking and talking in lists – as shown through this post.
2. Just discovered that you can not only link to individual uploaded songs on Myspace’s Music section, but you can also EMBED their music player for that specific song! (Great way to link to the actual song and, more importantly, to the actual musician’s Myspace page! I like this a lot because I’d much rather direct traffic to a musician’s account than a random person’s YouTube page simply because that’s the only place I [thought] I could find a link for the song I’m discussing.)
3. I love Kids at Midnight’s song “No No Yeah Yeah” because it begins with a chiptune beat then grows into a fuller indietronica song with more synth riffs and Jane Hanley’s trip-hop-y vocals. [MORE TO COME]
4. I need to remember to compile all my Monday Morningwoods, Lesbian Tuesdays, Hump Days, Friday I’m in Love Songs, and Saturday Rilo Kiley Mornings and actually post them here! [MORE TO COME!]
I’ve been posting updates through the BoxSpeaker Music Blog Facebook page. I’ll do a review of the various theme days’ songs including but no limited to the MONDAY MORNINGwoods, Wednesday Hump Day Songs, Music to Bone To songs, Friday I’m in Love Songs, and Rilo Kiley Saturday Mornings.
As for now, I present my blog post “‘Parentheses’ by The Blow — Evolution in Two Years”:
In a few days, it will have been exactly two years since I was lying in a bed in New York crying. It was my 20th birthday, and the very first thing I did upon waking was cry about how “nothing matters.” Very Camus-Absurdist, right?
One of the things I remember most about that morning was how the girl I was dating at the time just swooped in and held me, sheltering me from the world and showing me that I was safe.
We talked about feeling like nothing matters, advice her dad gave her, and a couple other topics that I can’t remember. The point is: I felt safe in her arms.
When I heard “Parentheses” by The Blow, the part “And when you’re holding me, / We make a pair of parentheses / There’s plenty space to encase / Whatever weird way my mind goes / I know I’ll be safe in these arms,” it reminded me exactly of that moment. No one had ever made me feel that safe before. “Safe” — It’s such a soft word to say, but the feeling itself has strength beyond anything I can even imagine.
Fast-forward over a year later to January 30, 2011. San Francisco. The Great American Music Hall.
The girl I was dating at the time (not the same as the one in New York) and I went to the Blow’s concert there. As usual, we were late to the show. Upon arriving, the girl I was dating mentioned that it was almost all women and that it was “such a lesbian event” and that every event I take her to is a “gay thing” or so. (Note: As much as I love The Blow, I actually didn’t even know that The Blow was having a concert in SF until the girl I was dating at the time told me to sign up for those tickets for her when I was grabbing some free concert tickets. Also, when we were at Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival, she was the one who wanted to see the Indigo Girls — I’d never actually listened to them before then. The only show I really pushed her to go to with me was Passion Pit, but I digress…)
Anyway… I was glad that I got to see The Blow (which is actually now just one person) perform “True Affection” but was almost completely devastated that I missed “Parentheses.” [I know, a lot of adverbs…]
Fast-forward to today, Wednesday, January 4, 2012.
Almost two years since the absurdist crying incident.
And I’m wondering where “Parentheses” fits into my life now.
I’m listening to my iPod that I haven’t used in over a year. Not only am I re-experiencing all the emotions associated with these songs I haven’t listened to in ages, but I am also tacking on my new emotions, interpretations, and life experiences with these songs, creating an even newer overall meaning to me. I can’t remember if it was Barthes or Benjamin (or maybe someone else completely?), but one of the critics we studied extensively in my Media Studies classes mentioned something about how the meanings of pieces of media are dynamic because we, ourselves, are ever-changing, so the way we experience that piece of media always changes.
This song, in conjunction with the set of songs I’ve been listening to, my New Year’s emotional breakdown, neuroticisms brought upon me by my cold-induced self-quarantine, and insomnia among other possible causes, has led me to thinking that maybe at this point in my life, I’m not the person being safe in someone else’s arms but rather am the person who tries to make sure others feel safe. With further analysis and “soul-searching,” that interpretation may change.
For now, I hope that I can successfully make people feel safe in my arms even if one of my arms is decommissioned due to a severely and stupidly pulled muscle.
So here’s to hopefully reassessing how I feel about “Parentheses” next year and the year after.
To be completely honest, this song caught my eye because of the band name, Data Romance, which OF COURSE I’d like being a lover of all things robots and data.
Anyway, it’s one of those songs you should listen to during your commute because it’s so relaxing for that time as the fog starts to burn off.